My fat

So, let’s talk about my weight again. I gained some and I'm not happy about it. I read a quote that said something like "my life is a constant struggle between my love of food and not wanting to be fat." This is so true. It sucks. I don't want to not eat or pass up a big old piece of pie or not be able to dip my crab legs in butter because I'm dieting but I don't want to be overweight. I tried moderation but that is less than satisfying for me. I need motivation. I tried putting skinny quotes in my home, such as "Don't eat the cake you fat pig." That didn't help. What I need is a personal shopper, chef and trainer. That's not going to happen, so I made a food list instead. Be ready, it's long. I felt the need to add 2 bites of this and 1 spoonful of that because that's where I'm feeling I screw up. This is day one.
1. 3 bites of cereal
2. Coffee with cream
3. Banana
4. Rice cake
5. Chuck of cheddar cheese
6. 10 pita chips
7. Slice of Muenster cheese
8. Salad with lettuce and peppercorn dressing
9. 1 bite of turkey sandwich
10. 1/2 slice of turkey
11. 3 pieces salt water taffy
12. 4 chips
13. 1/2 cup yogurt
14. 1 crystal lite tea
15. 1/2 Bagel with cream cheese
16. Cutie (baby orange)
17. 2 bites of bagel
18. 3 marshmallows
19. 3 green beans
20. Bite of chicken
21. Green tea with honey
22. Tootsie roll pop
23. 1 cup taffy apple salad
24. 2 big potato wedges
25. 1/2 cup pasta salad
26. Brownie
27. Mini cupcake
28. 2 handfuls goldfish
29. Mini cupcake
30. 2 bite size Twix
31. 1 air head

I had at least a gallon of water and more low or zero calorie teas. I'm sure I had a few more bites here and there too. I think it only looks like a lot. I was going to enter it into calorie counter but I know the brownie was probably over half of my daily calories.
I noticed my problem is sugar and it's probably the reason my skin is disgusting right now and why I have dandruff.
Maybe I will try to do better tomorrow. On the plus side, I walked for 50 minutes today.